The Buhner.com Blog

Sometimes I can be such a jackass. But it’s the jackasses that bring it out of me.

I’m driving to Riverhead to go to the Chinese buffet last night and we find this good parking space near the buffet. I go to pull in and this man stands completely in my way, slowly walking in my path to the space. I assume that he’s making his way to his car, and instead of honking at him, I wait. He continues to walk in my path and then turns, standing directly in front of the parking spot.

He’s saving the spot.

I motion for him to move, and he points to another parking spot. Any other time, this would have been an acceptable spot, but it’s just the principle of the thing. People can’t claim parking spots. They’re people. Especially if the car is nowhere near the spot that’s being held for it. It’s like calling “shotgun” the night before a trip.

So the pointing and gesturing continues. He’s not moving, and neither am I. I’ve got two passengers in the car that are telling me 80 different things, but it all sounds like gibberish because the more I see this happen, the more I’m getting pissed. This guy is a friggin’ jackass. Why not have his wife or whomever was driving the car park somewhere else? What’s the big issue?

(Of course, I should be asking myself the same questions at this point, but remember, I’m a jackass. This jackass has infected me with his disease.)

I’m directed to another spot four spots away by one of my passengers. I’m tired of dealing with the situation (as much as I’d like to run the jackass over, I’m pretty sure it’s not legal, even if he is blocking a parking space with his body), so I punch it in reverse and go to take the spot… which some other car is getting ready to pull into.

Ok, now I’m not going to lose two spaces. I punch it and cut into the spot… just a bit too tight. Some other nameless jackass has parked his huge truck next to it and never straightened it out, so it’s angled so that his left rear is pretty much in the spot. It pushes in the side of my car ever so slightly, making an annoying sound that still rings through my ears. I got the spot - but at a hell of a price.

You think I was pissed before? It’s quadrupled now. I launch into a shouting match with the space-blocker. I just pretty much launched into him both barrels, and I don’t think I’ve ever been that close to physically assaulting someone. He played dumb as if people do this all the time.

Of course, my always helpful wife gets out of the car finally (she was sitting in the back - I think she actually screamed when I hit the truck) and tells me I need anger management.

That’s spousal support right there. I’m flipping out at someone she was telling me to slam on the horn for and run over, and she’s now pissed off at me. That’s exactly what I needed.

It’s all since passed. Me and the wife are cool again (although she probably still thinks I need anger management, and maybe I do), and the damage to the car isn’t that bad - there’s no obvious damage to the paint, and the dent can probably be pulled out with no problem. Maybe I’ll go see Cliff and see how much it’ll run me.

None of this would have happened if I had a motorcycle.

Being a Yankee fan, why not look at two guys tearing it up for AAA Columbus right now?

OF Mitch Jones - Jones seems to be more out of the “corner outfielder/first baseman” mold. He hit 39 home runs at AA Trenton last season. Why is he not on the prospect radar? Well, Jones is 27 years old, and those 39 home runs were sandwiched around a .246 batting average. Jones admittedly got a slow jump having spent time at Arizona State and not starting his pro career at the age of 22, despite having been drafted four times (Texas in ‘97, Baltimore in ‘98 and ‘99, and the Yankees in 2000).

Jones has never hit for average since leaving Arizona State, and spent part of three seasons in A ball until finally getting called up to AA Norwich in 2002, where he spent another three seasons (in Norwich and Trenton, where the Yankees moved their AA franchise). While Jones increased his home run total at Trenton from 23 to 39 last season, his strikeouts increased as well - from 131 to 152, an alarming number at AA. So far at AAA, Mitch is slugging an amazing .898 with six home runs in 15 games (to go with a .424 batting average), but the strikeouts are still there - 18.

P Colter Bean - Ok, Colter I don’t understand. I know you don’t generally draft players to be middle relievers. Most middle relievers or set-up-men (finger quotes) are converted starters who couldn’t make it as a starter, whether it be that they were ineffective as a starter or that they didn’t have the stamina to last. Mariano Rivera was a failed starter, so was Eric Gagne.

Colter only started two games during his four years at Arizona State. He’s definitely a relief guy. That being said, he’s already proven himself in the Yankees organization. He’s old for a “prospect” (he’s 28), but he’s only spent 4 1/2 seasons in the minors (starting at 23 after four years at Auburn), and when you’re dealing with relievers, “prospect” isn’t really even a consideration. But what’s to stop a team from playing him?

Here’s Colter’s statistics from last season: 9-3, 2.29 ERA, 82.2 IP, 61 H, 23 BB, 109 K
This season - no different: 1-0, 0.00 ERA, 8.1 IP, 2 H, 1 BB, 14 K

Boston plucked Bean (pun not intended) away from the Yankees via Rule 5 last season, but returned him. Since then, Bean has stayed in Columbus and pitched lights-out for the Clippers. He’s not closing in Columbus, but that’s pretty much the only concern someone might have (can he take pressure situations?)

The Yankees right handed bullpen looks like this: Tom Gordon, Steve Karsay, Paul Quantrill, Mariano Rivera, and Felix Rodriguez. One injury to any of these players could see Bean come up, but there is a strong enough investment in all of these players that the Yankees aren’t going to cut one to bring up Bean. The 2006 season may be Bean’s time, as all those pitchers (except Rivera) are in the final year of their contracts. Considering Gordon and Quantrill’s ages and Karsay’s injury history, there’s sure to be a different looking bullpen in New York in 2006.

But that doesn’t stop me from wanting to see Colter now. It’s too enticing.

I’m really jonesing (jonezing?) for a motorcycle. The nice weather recently and the Red Knights thing (mental note - remind Tara about Red Knights meeting Wednesday 5/4, 7PM at Springs firehouse) has reminded me that I don’t have a bike anymore, and how annoyed I am that I don’t have one.

See, there was a time that I have three motorcycles. Yes, three. I owned a 1994 Honda Nighthawk, a ‘79 Kawasaki, and a ‘78 (I think) Honda. The Nighthawk I flat out owned - the other two bikes were given to me by a person who I worked with one summer who knew I liked the bikes. They were sitting in his garage and he just wanted to get rid of them.. They both had mechanical problems, but he said that if I wanted them, I could have them, as long as I came and picked them up. My dad and I picked the two up and he started working on them.

He got both working well, but the Honda had one issue - it wouldn’t break 55 MPH. It was weird - there was no governor on it or anything like that, and the RPMs would be moving up, but as soon as that thing hit 55, it would level out and cruise at 55. The Kawi ran good, though. It wasn’t a pretty bike, but it didn’t look bad.

The only other issue I ran into was the titles. The guy had given me the titles, but never signed them or anything. I only worked there that summer, and the one time I asked him he kind of shrugged it off. One title was in his name, and one was in someone else’s name, someone who the guy who gave me the bikes said was a “friend” of his son’s. That title was filled out in the back to be transferred over to the guy who was given the bikes - he had just never mailed it in.

So, technically, one bike I could just fill out the info transferring it over to me, but the other one was sticky - I couldn’t just cross out the info and put my own, and not having contact with this guy again, I couldn’t see myself sending in the title so that I could get it in his name then have him fill it out and re-send in the title so that it could get transferred over to me.

So the bikes sat, especially after my dad passed away. Over the years, I couldn’t really ride them, for one reason or another - first I was bouncing back and forth from Nassau and Bridgehampton, then I started living in Nassau, then I moved to Hampton Bays where motorcycles weren’t “allowed” (plus I had no place to park the thing).

Finally, near the end of 2003, we moved to Bridgehampton where we had access to a garage. In fact, it was the same garage where the bike was located in the first place. By this time, I only had one bike - the Kawasaki. I had given away the Honda the year after my father passed away (I don’t think that 55 MPH thing ever got fixed) and I sold the Nighthawk because as a 250, I was outgrowing the thing. By the time we moved in, it was kind of passed motorcycle weather, but there was always next year.

Then the baby came. My son was born the middle of May, so my first priority wasn’t really riding the bike. I was pretty busy, but knew there had to be some way to get that thing registered - that was the bike that had the title that had the friend’s name on it and was signed over to my former co-worker. I figured there had to be some loophole that I could get around to get the bike legal and on the road.

Shortly after this, my aunt and cousins make a pilgrimage to see my mom. Note I said my mom: they never once came to visit us or my son. In fact, the one time my wife came over there with my son, they barely acknowledged their presence. God, I love family.

Anyway, during the time that they were there and my mom and her boyfriend wined and dined them with lobster and cookouts, I saw one of the males of the group (I’ll assume one of my cousin’s husbands) screwing around with the bike. Whatever, I thought. Reminds me that I have to get off my butt and see if I can’t get that thing properly registered.

A week passes, and the cousins and aunt leave - once again, without a word to me. I walk over one day to the garage to look at the bike and it’s gone. No sign of it anywhere.

Yeah, you guessed it. My mom gave Cletus the bike. Never asked me, never thought twice about it. Just gave it to him. It was a huge slap in the face. Why not ask me? I could even understand if she had helped me purchase the bike (as she did the Nighthawk), but no - this I got on my own. I was steamed, and it STILL pisses me off every time I think about it. Here were these people who wouldn’t even speak to me - too good to visit the newest member of the family - and my mom was falling all over herself to make these people like her, enough to give them a lobster dinner (I was later asked if I wanted the leftovers - very nice) and a motorcycle.

I don’t hate my mom, although I really think this was a horrible judgment call for her, but people wonder why I have no use for the majority of my family. That’s why.

I would generally leave the Twins to others more qualified to do so in the OOTP Blogging Circle, but when it was brought to my attention that the Twins were carrying 4 catchers on their 25 man roster, it sparked my interest.

I’m a catching nut, and I know how easy it can be for a team to want to carry three catchers on their roster. Four, however, seemed a bit out of the ordinary, so I went to take a look at the Twins 25 man roster to see how they could pull it off.

First, the Twins are carrying 11 pitchers, which is a bit unusual for a team in April. Generally, teams will carry 12 pitchers in April to protect their starters, whom they don’t want pitching too many innings that early in the season. The Twins have enough players in their bullpen that can go more than an inning in relief, so they can survive with 11 pitchers without much of a problem.

The roster only lists four outfielders - Jacque Jones, Shannon Stewart, Torii Hunter, and Lew Ford. All four are considered starters; Ford is the DH, while the other three play the field. One might think that this puts the outfield in danger, as Ford can’t go from DH to the outfield in case of an injury or substitution without causing the team to lose the DH and forcing the pitcher to bat.

That problem is fixed in the infield. Both Nick Punto and Michael Cuddyer played the outfield last season, with Punto spending a minor amount of time in center field, and Cuddyer playing the corners. Punto has also started at second, third, and shortstop in his short major league career, while Cuddyer has started at second, third, first, left, and right. Fellow backup infielder Juan Castro has played every infield position in his career.

The Twins are using an interesting philosophy when it comes to their roster - if you want to play on the major league roster, either be good enough to start every day, or bring something else to the table. The Twins “four catchers” is a bit misleading too - Matt LeCroy is considered the fourth catcher, but he’s more of an emergency catcher than anything, someone who could catch, but isn’t in any contention for ever getting a major league role as a starting catcher anytime soon.

The Twins are carrying four catchers because they want to be careful with Joe Mauer’s knee, something that’s understandable. The guy had knee surgery at 21 at a position that requires a lot of stress on the knees. I’ve torn meniscus in my time (I was 19 when I did it) and it didn’t feel good. I didn’t get it worked on (or had any therapy) until 6 years later, and I pay for it every day. Mauer’s one to be careful for too - he’s completely lived up to the hype when he’s played, but after missing most of last season with that knee problem, the Twins aren’t taking any chances.

Most likely, the “four catcher” experiment ends when Justin Morneau comes off the DL, and the Twins get comfortable with Mauer behind the plate most of the time, and Redmond (I’ll assume he stays with Corky Miller* getting sent down/DFAed) getting every 5th-6th start. The Twins approach to roster management allows for neat tricks like this, but keeps otherwise deserving players off the roster. The Twins have already lost Mike Restovich to waivers and were without Lew Ford and Justin Morneau in the beginning of last season because of the desire to keep the flexible non-hitting multi-position-fielding players on the roster. Ford was only called up because Shannon Stewart started the season on the DL, and Morneau was only called up when the team realized that they could only look at Doug Mientkiewicz in the lineup for so long with Morneau hitting 22 home runs and a 300+ average in only 72 games in AAA.

The approach is a good one, especially for a team that can’t afford to drop $2 million for a 4th outfielder, but too much isn’t always a good thing.

*Interesting fact from the Twins website - Corky Miller’s given name is… wait for it… Corky Miller. HIS MOTHER NAMED HIM CORKY.

Stuff I want to address before it gets too late but don’t want to talk much about.

Sheets signs with Milwaukee longterm - See? That’s what I’m talking about. It’s hard to believe that Ben Sheets has 4 years of major league experience already. Sheets has always pitched decently, with a good walk to strikeout ratio, and this past season dropping his ERA a bit. It looks like he’s turned the corner, and Milwaukee extending Sheets’ contract keeps him in a Milwaukee uniform while sending a message to Brewer fans that the team is committed to winning. Pickups like this help players who are trying to pick between two similar teams pick one over the other.

Perez and Bay struggling for Pittsburgh - The Pirates made news this offseason when they hardlined two of their best players out of a few hundred thousand dollars in their contracts. While both Oliver Perez, the Pirates best pitcher last season, and Jason Bay, the National League Rookie of the Year were asking for raises, the Pirates elected to give the players all they were required to give them, which were two small raises, which peaved both players and teammates, namely Jack Wilson. Both have responded so far this season with mediocre play - Perez has pitched poorly in three starts so far this season, while Bay’s got a hearty .304 slugging percentage and only 3 runs scored and 3 RBI. It isn’t fair to say that the two aren’t playing to their full potential - anyone can slump - but one has to wonder if the two have been somewhat affected by how they felt they were treated during the offseason. It’s doubtful though, because if both continue to play poorly, they’re just proving management right for not signing them longterm, and hurting their chances of signing a big money deal.

Sheffield avoids fine and suspension - Gary Sheffield won’t get punished by MLB for his reaction towards a fan in a game against Boston. Sheffield’s reaction was questionable, but not harsh, and outside of a shove, there was no contact made. I think a one-game suspension may have been best if you wanted to send the message that players should never have contact with fans, but I don’t have a real issue with letting Sheffield off the hook. I think his raction was normal, and if it keeps fans form interfering in the game (or especially with players), then so be it. I also think that the punishment for the fan was appropriate. They’ve taken his season tickets away for the season, but will also refund his money and reconsider renewing his tickets for the 2006 season. It’s not too harsh, but it also sends a message that doing what he did won’t be tolerated.

Orioles going after Helton? - Laura Vecsey of the Baltimore Sun seems to be using the New York media style of writing - when the news is slow, make up a trade rumor that is feasable regardless of whether or not it’s been discussed. Vessey takes a team that feels it could use a first baseman (Baltimore) and pairs it with a first baseman with a huge contract who is on a team going with a youth movement. There’s even a “Yankees might be interested” reference in there. Realisticly though, there’s not much Baltimore can offer Colorado that makes it worth it for the Rockies to deal their best player, except for payroll help, and Helton is too good of a player for that. It would be interesting to see what Helton would do playing completely out of Coors, though - Helton is still a very good hitter outside of Coors, but not the kind of hitter he is in Colorado. An extended run outside of Coors with good power and average numbers would help his Hall of Fame credentials.