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Bizarre Toy of the Day: Baby Alive Go Bye-Bye Doll

You know what a sucker I am for dolls. Right, I'm not. Because dolls are for girls, and I'm 100% man, baybee. Actually, now that I have kiddles of my own, I've noticed more the gender classification of toys, some of which seem to beadded unnecessarily. Thinks like pretend kitchens and "doll houses" are almost always bright pink with flowers and smell like baby powder (warning: does not contain real babies) despite it being pretty gender neutral to want to play with such items. After all, if your kid wants to be another Alton Brown, he shouldn't have to learn on a magenta stovetop. And hey, the original GI Joe was the same scale as a Barbie, right? Granted, a bearded killing machine Barbie, but from a math perspective, the same scale.

This is a remnant of the old standing belief that toys should teach and influence children to become interested in their future career as adults, whether it be as a homemaker or bearded killing machine.

Which brings us to the Baby Alive Go Bye-Bye Doll. The concept of the Baby Alive series is simple - allow small children to pretend to be a mommy (no daddies allowed, seemingly by the description) by giving them a practice baby that does common baby things (eat, poop, etc.) that they take care of without killing it. Good in theory, but the Baby Alive people didn't think out the Bye-Bye doll that well.

The Bye-Bye doll (or BBD, as I feel stupid typing that out every time) comes with a "5 in 1 carrier", which functions as a feeding chair, rocking cradle, front pack (so you can use your baby as a shield), baby carrier, and travel bag. In the commercial for the product (now since changed, at least online) you see the various functions, and see the "mommie" get out of the car with the BBD still in its' baby carrier. Mommy comes back to show us the travel bag feature, simply converting the baby carrier by folding it in half WITH THE BABY STILL IN IT.

Awww, how cute.

mmmph