Buhner.com

I got this from the Miami Dol­phins (who have pos­si­bly the worst online “pro shop” in all of sports) in my email today:

NEED A LAST MINUTE GIFT, FAST? Vir­tual gift cards are deliv­ered via e-mail within 24 hours!

I under­stand how peo­ple don’t like gift cards because there isn’t that much “thought” put into them, but I can under­stand them; I wouldn’t want to shop for me, since I’m very par­tic­u­lar with the things I use, and a gift card makes life eas­ier for peo­ple, espe­cially if they’re send­ing some­thing in the mail (instead of cash).

But really, what kind of mes­sage does it send to say “hey, here’s an email that you’ll prob­a­bly delete as spam because I for­got that tomor­row is Christ­mas because I live in Antarc­tica and South Pole peo­ple refuse to acknowl­edge the actions of those at the North Pole”?

These are kind of the lay­ers of giftgiving:

• Price­less item (cure for can­cer, super powers)
• Item so expen­sive can only be bought in the­ory (275 carat dia­mond, Space Shut­tle, Norway)
• items with mean­ing / good pos­i­tive thought behind it
• Gift cards (> $100)
• High priced items with no thought behind it
• High priced items with neg­a­tive thoughts or under­ly­ing rea­son­ing for it (Here’s a new stove, now get off your ass and make me some dinner)
• Gift cards ($25-$100)
• Low priced items with no thought behind it
• Gift cards (< $25)
• Low priced items with neg­a­tive thoughts or under­ly­ing rea­son­ing for it (Here’s a con­dom — I heard your new girl­friend has a “reputation”)
• Noth­ing
• “Vir­tual” gifts (I gave you noth­ing, but I will insist that it was some­thing and become angered when you don’t appre­ci­ate it)
• Punch in the face